Look at me, I have a blog. This means that I think I have something important to say and other people should take note. Or that I’m bored and willing to devote more free time than is typically healthy sitting in front of a glowing screen spewing mostly nonsensical streams of zeroes and ones out into Cyberia. Whatever the cause, I’ve toyed around with the (not exactly fresh) idea of doing a personal movie blog for a few years, and now is apparently the time to make it happen.
If my Netflix account is to be believed I have thus far rated in the neighborhood of 2500 films & TV shows. I guess that means I’ve watched them all, too. (Whoopity-doo! Lookatme!!) I’m pretty meticulous about keeping tabs on lists that others have made, mostly so I can flagellate myself for all of the things I have not seen yet. I tend more toward the culty, artsy-fartsy, and independent stuff. I’m pretty steeped in the classics, but try to stay in touch with the modern scene. However, I am by no means above a good’n’turrible B-flick or using stupid terms like “artsy-fartsy.”
In embarking upon this endeavor, I should probably set up some ground rules for myself, some goals that I hope to achieve, some weekly deadline to abide or quota to fulfill. But frankly I’m a procrastinator and usually totally half-assed. So I’m not gonna do any of those things until this experiment has a chance to bloom.
Here’s what to expect, my currently non-existent readership: I’m gonna watch movies, whether you like it or not. [I’m shooting for a rough goal of 300 this year.] Some of them might be new releases. Most of them won’t be. Movie theaters are expensive, so unless I’m brushing up for awards season there will be a lot of DVD-release-timed reviews. I’m gonna try to write a little something something as I go. It might be only a few lines, and if I’m busy I might just post a very basic list of what I’ve recently watched and try to add reviews later. It probably won’t be polished criticism or groundbreaking theory, but I’ll make an effort to make it worthwhile to follow.
Be forewarned. There will be salty language from time to time. Some of the posts might obviously be lubricated by cocktails. Those should be fun.
I’m not really all that interested in subjectively rating movies just for the sake of settling the “which is better?” question. It’s an experience, not a competition. However, given that there’s a standard of practice, I’ll probably acquiesce and score them. I intend to use a totally arbitrary and meaningless numerical system ranging from Eleventy Billion on the upper end (reserved for mindblowing classics like “The Blues Brothers” and “North by Northwest.”) down to, let’s say -100 (on the “Blues Brothers 2000,” “Mortal Kombat: Annihilation” end of the spectrum). There may also be thumbs, stars, letter grades, and/or various ripenesses of tomatoes involved, depending on my attitude toward the given film on that particular day. This scoring process may evolve or disappear entirely.
Most reviews will generally be positive. I can be a little choosy in what I watch because I can't afford to pay for -- and am not yet being paid to sit through -- just anything and everything. However, I am more than willing to reconsider this position and dust off my skewers if necessary. Especially if the price is right.
I might also link to trailers or clips and point to (and maybe write about) other good stuff from around the web, but I’ll try to make this ultimately about original content.
Down lights. Open curtain. On with the show.
